3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
