If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
