I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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