Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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