Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
