watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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