i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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