Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I love you.
Bad choice
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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