i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
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