your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
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