This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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