Texts From Last Night

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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.

  (917): View more from New York City

  Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.

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  (812): Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background. (917): Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex. (812): Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds. http://tfl.nu/5x1m
  Replies (32) Good night (575) Bad night (1807)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.

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  (904): Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight. http://tfl.nu/aofb
  Replies (11) Good night (770) Bad night (3772)
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  (518): View more from New York

  everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.

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  (518): everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem. http://tfl.nu/bvtl
  Replies (30) Good night (4040) Bad night (756)
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  (456): View more from

  im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out

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  (456): im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out http://tfl.nu/zwp7
  Replies (27) Good night (4146) Bad night (1110)
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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.

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  (+64): No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker. http://tfl.nu/g6g3
  Replies (7) Good night (6092) Bad night (709)
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  (347): View more from New York

  I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning

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  (347): I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning http://tfl.nu/a79g
  Replies (10) Good night (4876) Bad night (828)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.

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  (618): So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate. http://tfl.nu/opcy
  Replies (9) Good night (1156) Bad night (3158)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?

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  (214): Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece? http://tfl.nu/qvgx
  Replies (9) Good night (1539) Bad night (938)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...

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  (+44): A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh... http://tfl.nu/ky7u
  Replies (5) Good night (657) Bad night (1946)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.

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  (608): I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week. http://tfl.nu/5pj6
  Replies (9) Good night (1978) Bad night (674)
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  (714): View more from California

  She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.

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  (714): She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap. http://tfl.nu/1x8o
  Replies (10) Good night (579) Bad night (1302)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  You can't spell "party" without "RA."

  (1-970): View more from Colorado

  You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."

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  (970): You can't spell "party" without "RA." (1-970): You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired." http://tfl.nu/jawl
  Replies (4) Good night (890) Bad night (454)
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  (310): View more from California

  Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.

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  (310): Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure. http://tfl.nu/ptmp
  Replies (2) Good night (685) Bad night (348)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!

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  (918): Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night! http://tfl.nu/ci8u
  Replies (4) Good night (514) Bad night (288)
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  (760): View more from California

  Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!

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  (760): Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes! http://tfl.nu/whwq
  Replies (1) Good night (530) Bad night (99)

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