he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I forgot how hot balto sounded
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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