You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
