The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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