so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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