Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Who died my cat blue again?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
