i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
