I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize