Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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