My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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