Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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