so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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