i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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