I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
