So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
