Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
