even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
All I want is dick and wine.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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