THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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