Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
