Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
