were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
