he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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