No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
