You made me cry and you don't even care
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
