whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
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But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
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Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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