super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
