found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
