yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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