why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
