i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I need a beard to bite.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
