I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
