This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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