Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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