Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them