Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.