i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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