Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
My butt remains clenched, sir.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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