sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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