Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
