I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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