i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
