I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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