dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Is Oprah even human
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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